Q: What is white and sits on your TV?
A: A fly wearing a nightie.
Girl: So, how many times a day do you shave?
Man: Well, about 15-20 times every day.
Girl: My god, are you some kind of crazy?
Man: No, I’m a barber.
Wife: “Whenever I keep money in my purse, our son steals it! I don’t know what to do?”
Husband: “Hide it in his books. I know he will never touch them.”