School
Laughter and humor is still the best medicine, so get well with some funny jokes today. We have put together hundreds of pages of classic clean school jokes
Latest Jokes
Best School Jokes
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in SchoolA double positive can form a negative
A linguistics professor was lecturing to his class. “In English,” he said, “a double negative form a positive. In some languages, though, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative.” A voice from the back of the room piped up, […] More
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What pregnant means?
“Give me a sentence about a public servant,” said a teacher. The small boy wrote: “The fireman came down the ladder pregnant.” The teacher took the lad aside to correct him. “Don’t you know what pregnant means?” she asked. “Sure,” said the young student confidently. “Means carrying a child.” More
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Surprise!
At a girl’s college dormitory, dates were permitted only on Saturday night. One young man showed up on a Tuesday evening, explaining to an older woman in the lobby of the dorm that it was imperative he see a certain young lady immediately. “I want to surprise her. You see, I’m her brother.” “Oh, she’ll […] More
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Children brought gifts
On the first day of school, the children brought gifts for their teacher. The florist’s son brought the teacher a bouquet of flowers. The candy-store owner’s daughter gave the teacher a pretty box of candy. Then the liquor-store owner’s son brought up a big, heavy box. The teacher lifted it up and noticed that […] More
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What did Eve say to Adam?
Little Mary was not the best student in Sunday School. Usually, she slept through the class. One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, “Tell me, Mary, who created the universe?” When Mary didn’t stir, little Johnny, an altruistic boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her […] More
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She has one fault
Eight-year-old Sally brought her report card home from school. Her marks were good…mostly A’s and a couple of B’s. However, her teacher had written across the bottom: “Sally is a smart little girl, but she has one fault. She talks too much in school. I have an idea I am going to try, which I […] More
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in School
Educated Fool
A student at a management school came up to a pretty girl and hugged her without any warning. The surprised girl said, “What was that?” The guy smiled at her, “Direct marketing!” The girl slapped him soundly. “What was that?!” said the boy, holding his cheek. “Customer feedback.” More
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Blind date
How was your blind date?” a college student asked her roommate. “Terrible!” the room-mate answered. “He showed up in his 1932 Rolls Royce.” “Wow! That’s a very expensive car. What’s so bad about that?” “He was the original owner.” More
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in School
Final Exam
A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow’s final exam. ‘Now class, I won’t tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury, illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that’s it, no other excuses whatsoever!’ A smart-ass student in the back […] More
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Beans After All
A teacher asked her students to use the word “beans” in a sentence. “My father grows beans,” said one girl. “My mother cooks beans,” said a boy. A third student spoke up, “We are all human beans.” More
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in School
I would do anything
A student comes to a young professor’s office hours. She glances down the hall, closes his door, and kneels pleadingly. “I would do anything to pass this exam,” she says. She leans closer to him, flips back her hair, and gazes meaningfully into his eyes. “I mean,” she whispers, “I would do anything…” He returns […] More
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First day at school
The child comes home from his first day at school. His mother asks, “Well, what did you learn today?” The kid replies, “Not enough. They want me to come back tomorrow.” More
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