Best Random Jokes

  • Hits It Every Time
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    Hits It Every Time

    At a local gun show, two guys were bragging about their wife’s abilities. “My wife’s a fine shot. She can hit a dollar every time.” “That’s nothing. My wife goes through my trousers and never misses a dime.” More

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  • Tell him!

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    Tell him!

    A little boy comes down for breakfast and his mother asks if he had done his chores. “Not yet,” says the little boy. His mother tells him that until he completes them, he won’t be getting any breakfast. Well, he’s a little angry, so he goes to feed the chickens and kicks one. He goes […] More

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  • Well, what's the name?

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    Well, what’s the name?

    A pregnant woman gets into a car accident and falls into a deep coma. Asleep for nearly six months, she wakes up and sees that she is no longer pregnant. Frantically, she asks the doctor about her baby. The doctor replies, “Ma’am, you had twins! A boy and a girl. The babies are fine. Your […] More

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  • Two buddies were sharing drink

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    Two buddies were sharing drink

    Two buddies were sharing drinks while discussing their wives. “Do you and your wife ever do it doggie style?” asked the one. “Well, not exactly.” his friend replied, “she’s more into the trick dog aspect of it.” “Oh, I see, kinky, huh?” “Well, not exactly – I sit up and beg and she rolls over […] More

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  • Mystery...???
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    Mystery…???

    A man takes his place in the theater, but his seat is too far from the stage. He whispers to the usher, “This is a mystery, and I have to watch a mystery close up. Get me a better seat, and I’ll give you a handsome tip.” The usher moves him into the second row, […] More

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  • Miracle worker...
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    Miracle worker…

    Two guys and a union worker were fishing on a lake one day, when Jesus walked across the water and joined them in the boat. When the three astonished men had settled down enough to speak, the first guy asked, humbly, “Jesus, I’ve suffered from back pain ever since I took shrapnel in the Vietnam […] More

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  • Jumbo jet
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    Jumbo jet

    A man looked at the menu at the airport restaurant and saw that the sandwiches were named for planes. “I’ll have a ‘jumbo jet’,” he said. When the order arrived, he was disappointed to see how small his burger was, but he ate it anyway. He called his waiter over. “Was that the ‘jumbo jet’?” […] More

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  • Dusty day
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    Dusty day

    On a hot, dusty day a cowboy rode into a small frontier town. After dismounting, he walked behind his horse, lifted its tail, and kissed it where the sun doesn’t shine. An old man rocking by the general store witnessed the whole thing. “Whudd’ya do that fer?” he asked. “Got chapped lips,” the cowboy replied. […] More

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  • They're Exactly Alike
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    They’re Exactly Alike

    A family known for being extremely frugal was blessed with twin girls. Around three months a neighbor suggested that they have their pictures taken. The father thought this was a good ideal and the next time he saw the neighbor he showed him a photograph. “This is a fine picture” said the neighbor. “But this […] More

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  • Nothing Altered nor Touched
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    Nothing Altered nor Touched

    One afternoon there was a group of tourists on tour going through an ancient castle in Europe. They were accompanied by a tour guide. The guide said that the majestic castle was over 700 years old. He added that nothing had been altered or touched in all those years. One of the tourists blurted out, […] More

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